It is said that money has the power to transform people, but nothing can adequately prepare you for the experience of discovering that the person who has changed is your own mother. In times of difficulty, the one thing on which one can depend is their family. Family is meant to be everything else. In contrast, the wounds that are caused when the ones you love the most transform your compassion into their own personal ATM are more severe than any financial loss that could possibly occur.
Since the beginning of my memory, my mother has instilled in me the belief that the family unit should always come first. In my eyes, she was the one person who would never fail to fulfill my expectations; she was my rock and my most ardent supporter. She took the burden of our troubles so that I wouldn’t have to, despite the fact that life was difficult while I was growing up.
There was never a time when my father was involved, so it was always just the two of us for everything. The sacrifices she made and the love she had for me were never in question by me. Because of this, I did not hesitate when she contacted me that night, crying herself to tears and pleading for assistance.
When she spoke on the phone, her voice was shaking. Suddenly, she shouted out, “I need twenty thousand dollars right now, or I’m going to lose my home!” Despite the fact that I did not have that amount of money laying around, I could not bear to see her go through that. I didn’t give it a second thought before I went ahead and took out a loan to save her.
After a week had passed, I went to her home, prepared to provide her with support and to make sure that she was doing well. On the other hand, what I discovered left me dumbfounded. Furniture that is brand new and shiny. Large television with a flat screen. Rather than a sign of despair, everything screamed luxury.
In spite of my racing heart, I addressed her. “You told me that you would need the money to pay your debts! Whatever is going on here?
The woman did not flinch. There was no sign of guilt on her face. Instead, she chuckled and shrugged her shoulders. You are still young. You will eventually return. It is only fair that I am also joyful.
Her statements were like if they were a blow to the face. Despite the fact that she was the one who brought me up and for whom I would have done everything, she had played me like a fool.
Now, each and every night, I find myself lying awake, suffocated by the burden of a debt that no longer belongs to me. I find myself going over the talk over and over again in my thoughts, trying to find a way to rationalize what she did. All the same, there is no excuse. Whenever I make a payment on that loan, it serves as a jarring reminder that my own mother saw my giving as an exceptional chance.
There is always a warning that you should never combine family and money. But what do you do when your own mother is the one who tosses you into the deep end and watches you drown? Do you have any options?