My name is Mark, and I have been around for 58 years. In 2007, a malignancy of the head and neck was identified as being present in my body. Both radiation and surgery were used to remove the tumor as part of the treatment for this condition. I was able to live with recurrences of the cancer and more operations without the condition having a significant impact on my day-to-day life.
But by December of that year, my nose had already begun to fall apart. The cancer had progressed to the roof of my mouth and was making its way toward my eyes; thus, it was getting more difficult for me to cope with the discomfort.
It was determined that the best course of action would be to do another surgery in order to remove as much of the cancer as possible; however, this decision resulted in the removal of my nose as well. Since then, I have had a total of four further surgeries in addition to two skin grafts, which has resulted in a discernible change to my appearance.
A splint is put on my face and I wear it. This not only enables me to wear glasses, but it also hides the skin transplant that I had done. I have experimented with a stick-on prosthesis, but that resulted in a variety of problems for me. Because I have such poor double vision, I tape down my left eye. I have considered a variety of approaches, but I have not been able to find a solution to my visual problem as of yet.
The procedure has had both practical and emotional repercussions as a result of its completion. Due to my poor vision, I am unable to participate in two activities that were formerly among my favorite hobbies: riding my motorcycle and playing golf. My self-confidence and, as a result, my social life have suffered as a direct result of this.
It took me some time to come to the conclusion that these shifts are going to be here to stay and that I need to accept the current circumstances. Because of this, I made the decision to get in touch with Changing Faces to inquire about the many forms of assistance that are offered.
I learned about the Peer Group Chat service, and after reading about it, I thought it could be beneficial to chat to other individuals who also have an apparent difference in their appearance. It is an eight-week program, and I was optimistic that the experience would help me accept my visual difference, as well as that it would be a step towards developing the confidence to do things that I had done in the past. I was hoping that it would be a step toward building the confidence to do things that I had done in the past.
My participation in a chat room was an entirely novel experience for me. In the beginning, it was difficult for me to read, think, and type all at the same time, and the fact that I was the only guy in the group made things more difficult.
After some time had passed, I found that I was better able to handle all of this, and I began to enjoy my interactions with the group, which consisted of individuals of varied ages and with obvious physical distinctions.
They were an amazing group of people, and I don’t know whether that’s because I got fortunate or not. Everyone’s thoughts were taken into consideration. It seemed like a secure environment in which one could be open and honest about their own predicament and worries. Learning about the struggles endured by other members of the group was both humbling and motivating.
Even though we’d all been through tough times, we still found times to laugh and joke around, which is a testament to the fact that there is always room for humor and lightheartedness in the face of adversity.
My participation, it seems, has helped me get a better understanding of the circumstance I’m in. I have realized the significance of having self-confidence and that working to improve it need to be a top priority. I also became aware that the course of my life had altered. My focus should be ahead, on discovering what I can do and enjoy in the here and now, rather than backward, on the things that I was able to do in the past.
Each week, there were priceless moments.
I also believe that it is essential to avoid being too critical of oneself. When I conceal my face, I make an effort not to feel bad about it. If it is something that I can use at the present, then I will be satisfied with it.
Since I finished the sessions with my peers, I’ve been trying to have a more optimistic view of the circumstance I’m in and deal with it accordingly. I find inspiration in the ways that other individuals are able to deal with similar challenges and keep moving ahead.
In general, despite my first impression that the chat process was a source of frustration, Tiffany and Sam from the Changing Faces team did an excellent job of managing it. It was a really beneficial experience that I would suggest to anybody, including other Luddites, because of how much I got out of it.
